Monday, May 9, 2011
Treadmills are Stupid
In order to promote a healthy lifestyle, I have decided to create some athletic wear. This athletic, sweat resistant, 100% virtual t-shirt is perfect either for going to the gym, or not going to the gym.
Before you head over to the gym, I feel obligated to tell you that there will be no soft serve ice cream. I have been to several gyms and there has never been soft serve ice cream. Other people (some I know personally) have gone to gyms and reported the lack of ice cream. However if, despite the almost certain absence of soft serve, you find yourself at the gym you will need this shirt. Mainly because it is hard to be ironic while you are sweating, particularly if you find are on a treadmill. Ironic people are highly regarded, and this shirt will do all the work for you.
If you are not at the gym because you do indeed fell that treadmills might be slightly ridiculous, wearing this shirt will vindicate your life choice.
NOTE: If you find a gym with a soft serve machine, please comment to this post immediately. I will promptly send you a free virtual ‘Treadmills are Stupid’ t-shirt. It won’t exist, but it is dryer safe.